When I was still living in Colorado, I was taking film acting lessons for a while. My focus started to shift to screenwriting, so I took workshops for actors to write their own monologues, scenes, and even their own films. They were taught by a wonderful man, the agent of a now defunct agency called Big Fish Talent. I’m still sad that it doesn’t exist anymore.
One thing Peter, the agent/coach would say, was when something doesn’t work out the way you wanted it to, you shouldn’t dwell on it, you should move on. He would simply say, “Next!” Kind of like when you go in for an audition and they don’t like you (or maybe they do), and they say, “Next!” meaning the next person should come in. (And of course, he was saying you shouldn’t dwell if you didn’t get a certain part.)
This can be applied to so many things in our lives: Losing a job, a relationship that ends, a person who dies, a book that ends. It means that there is always going to be something waiting for you. Just like the old saying, “When a door closes, a window opens.” Even when a situation ends and it seems like nothing is going to happen, we just have to wait, and be patient. Something will come our way.
There are lots of articles out there talking about letting go and moving on. Moving on and letting go seem to be some of the hardest things for people to do, but we are faced with the choice to let go and move on in our daily lives. I think it is so hard for humans to do this because we have higher levels of thinking. Unlike animals, we can overanalyze everything if we want. And we have conscious choices; we can choose to dwell on things, or we can change our thinking patterns and accept what has transgressed and move on. Things seem to come to an end, but that doesn’t mean there are no more beginnings. I refuse to believe even that death is an ending, because it just means another life cycle can begin. There are no true endings, and no true beginnings. Nothing ever stops.
It’s not easy to make these conscious decisions. We are so programmed to use our brains in cognitive ways, to think, and then the part we have not much control over takes over – our emotions. Experiencing those emotions are good, but overanalyzing them are not always. Attempting to understand them, accepting them, and feeling them are productive. Dwelling on them to the point that it affects our daily lives is not.
When something comes to an end, give yourself time to grieve. Process your emotions and don’t deny them. But there comes a point when we must let go, so that we can experience our lives in the best ways possible and thrive. Holding on to the past, whether it’s a person who has died or left you, or a job you once had, is not going to help you move on into your future. Just remember: “Next!”
***This post is part of the Blogging from A-Z April challenge. Starting with A, every post in April will be about a topic starting with a letter of the alphabet, consecutively. For more information, please visit the official page.***